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Farmer
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:56 pm |
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| When they invented the first clock, how did they know where to set it?
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Farmer
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:28 pm |
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| Was the pole vault accidently discovered by a clumsy javelin thrower?
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Stormkitty
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:19 pm |
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| How much wind is in a windshield?
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Farmer
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:17 pm |
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| How do "Do Not Walk On The Grass" signs get there?
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Stormkitty
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:14 pm |
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LOL
Never picked up on that one.
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Farmer
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:13 pm |
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| Better yet, why aren't there "B" batteries?
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Stormkitty
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:10 pm |
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| LMAO @ Farmer...........good one!!!!
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Farmer
Member
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:09 pm |
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| Did George Washington pull out a quarter when asked for I.D.?
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Corn Nugget
Member
| Joined: | Wed Feb 14th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1712 |
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 02:52 pm |
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Eccentricity is not, as dull people would have us believe, a form of madness. It is often a kind of innocent pride, and the man of genius and the aristocrat are frequently regarded as eccentrics because genius and aristocrat are entirely unafraid of and uninfluenced by the opinions and vagaries of the crowd.
 Edith Sitwell (1887 - 1964),
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Corn Nugget
Member
| Joined: | Wed Feb 14th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1712 |
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 02:50 pm |
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| Might be a breath thing!
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driver
Member
| Joined: | Wed Feb 21st, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 203 |
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 05:22 am |
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| Why when you blow in a dogs face he gets mad? But when a dog rides in the car he sticks his head out the window.
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homer
Member
| Joined: | Sun Jun 25th, 2006 |
| Location: | Maryland USA |
| Posts: | 458 |
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Posted: Thu Jun 28th, 2007 03:33 am |
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"Why do they report power outages on TV?" 
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Discombobulated
Member
| Joined: | Thu Jun 14th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 35 |
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 01:53 pm |
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honker wrote: Maybe that's why you and the old man are so quick to start a fight on here....
FRUSTRATED??????
Try some counseling........
Hay Hoinker your name came up at the last MADD meetinng you know, Mothers Against Dumb Dickheds
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Slingblade
Member
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 01:08 pm |
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meinmd wrote: honker wrote: Maybe that's why you and the old man are so quick to start a fight on here....
FRUSTRATED??????
Try some counseling........
honker, that was completely uncalled for. This thread was about amusing nonsense questions and no attacks on anyone was needed. If you and slingblade and law-girl428 have issues they need to be handled elsewhere and not on these forums. If you can't settle your problems the just INGNORE each other. Thank you 'me'....seems most of his/her rantings are uncalled for .....check "banning"..I truely don't know what his/her problem is..but there doesn't seem to be a positive bone in their body
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SueCarol
Member
| Joined: | Fri Dec 2nd, 2005 |
| Location: | Maryland USA |
| Posts: | 2246 |
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Offline
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 01:02 pm |
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Hmm...corn, now THAT opens up a can of worms and quite a philosophical question.
Do we always yield to temptation...in order not to become sick of the soul.
Or are there times we must NOT yield to temptation in order NOT to be sick in our soul.
Bet we could debate that one, lol.
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Corn Nugget
Member
| Joined: | Wed Feb 14th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1712 |
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 12:57 pm |
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The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Resist it, and your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to itself.
Oscar Wilde
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meinmd
Member
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 12:52 pm |
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honker wrote: Maybe that's why you and the old man are so quick to start a fight on here....
FRUSTRATED??????
Try some counseling........
honker, that was completely uncalled for. This thread was about amusing nonsense questions and no attacks on anyone was needed. If you and slingblade and law-girl428 have issues they need to be handled elsewhere and not on these forums. If you can't settle your problems the just INGNORE each other.
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law_girl428
Member
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 03:04 am |
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honker wrote: Maybe that's why you and the old man are so quick to start a fight on here....
FRUSTRATED??????
Try some counseling........
Get a sense of humor. Your really a pain in the back-side, ruining every thread with your silliness and idle mind. You are, however, doing a great job amusing me. You see, there is nothing funnier at times then ignorance. While you ponder continuous taunts and slimy remarks to throw out to multiple individuals, ponder this...
“Have patience awhile; slanders are not long-lived. Truth is the child of time; erelong she shall appear to vindicate thee.”
"Our judgments judge us; and nothing reveals us [or] exposes our weaknesses more ingeniously than the attitude of pronouncing upon our fellows."
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honker
Banned
| Joined: | Mon Apr 2nd, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 259 |
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 02:43 am |
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Maybe that's why you and the old man are so quick to start a fight on here....
FRUSTRATED??????
Try some counseling........
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law_girl428
Member
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Posted: Wed Jun 27th, 2007 02:08 am |
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| Only 102? I guess I should write a book! LMAO
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Farmer
Member
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Posted: Tue Jun 26th, 2007 09:42 pm |
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| GO FIGURE!! Attachment: bed.jpg (Downloaded 471 times)
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veritas serum
Member
| Joined: | Tue Mar 27th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 130 |
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Posted: Sat Jun 23rd, 2007 02:06 am |
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What about these:
Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
Why aren't more than one mouse called mouses?
If in war, everyone shoots at one antother, why are some wars called Civil Wars?
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Just wondering
Member
| Joined: | Wed Apr 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1030 |
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Posted: Sat Jun 23rd, 2007 01:27 am |
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When a cow sneezes, does milk come out his nose ?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink ?
Is it true cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
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Slingblade
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 08:30 pm |
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Stormkitty wrote:
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him? ]
If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
Must be a slow law day??????
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Stormkitty
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 07:57 pm |
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Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him? ]
If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
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Slingblade
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 07:46 pm |
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4thekids wrote: What hair color do they put on the license of a bald man?
pink? or maybe Nautral???? or even Neutral
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4thekids
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 07:23 pm |
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| What hair color do they put on the license of a bald man?
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Chris Abbott
Member
| Joined: | Sun Jun 3rd, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 40 |
| Status: |
Offline
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 06:53 pm |
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law_girl428 wrote: Slingblade says....Well it’s Friday and I am sitting here at work pondering the little things in life....
like how thankful I am to be married to my beautiful wife who is ALWAYS right....
Where I will take my wife for dinner tonight because she is SO good to me
How many loads of laundry can I help my wife get done and put away tonight
And, geez, I will be tired after I vacuume for her.
Uh Oh....I hear a DEVO song..."Crack That Whip"!!! LMAO!!!
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Slingblade
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 06:39 pm |
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law_girl428 wrote: Slingblade says....Well it’s Friday and I am sitting here at work pondering the little things in life....
like how thankful I am to be married to my beautiful wife who is ALWAYS right.... ALWAYS????
Where I will take my wife for dinner tonight because she is SO good to me but you never know what you want to eat...
How many loads of laundry can I help my wife get done and put away tonight.. hummm
And, geez, I will be tired after I vacuume for her.
ok...yes dear.....
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law_girl428
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 06:25 pm |
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Slingblade says....Well it’s Friday and I am sitting here at work pondering the little things in life....
like how thankful I am to be married to my beautiful wife who is ALWAYS right....
Where I will take my wife for dinner tonight because she is SO good to me
How many loads of laundry can I help my wife get done and put away tonight
And, geez, I will be tired after I vacuume for her.
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Slingblade
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 05:16 pm |
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Slingblade wrote: Well it’s Friday and I am sitting here at work pondering the little things in life. (Sue carol don’t tell) These are some of the things that make you go hummmmmmm:
- Which DID come first the chicken or the egg?
- What does Osama look like WITH OUT his beard?
- Why is ZZ Top’s Drummer’s last name Beard but he doesn’t have one?
- Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
- Why did Monica keep that dress in the closet?
Then I thought what we need to do for certain things in life…like world peace…
Let’s ALL get peace orders against each other….
That has got to be nobel prize winning!!!
Have a great and safe weekend!!!!!! Rock on Alex, Geddy, and Neil
Chris,
we are just twisted like that
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Slingblade
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 05:15 pm |
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Stormkitty wrote: I think you both worship in the church of George Carlin!!!!!
He rocks!!!!!!!
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Stormkitty
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 05:14 pm |
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| Now that would be a service even I would attend...........LOL
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SueCarol
Member
| Joined: | Fri Dec 2nd, 2005 |
| Location: | Maryland USA |
| Posts: | 2246 |
| Status: |
Offline
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 05:13 pm |
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| I wont tell if you dont, slingblade, lol.
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Chris Abbott
Member
| Joined: | Sun Jun 3rd, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 40 |
| Status: |
Offline
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 05:12 pm |
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Stormkitty wrote: I think you both worship in the church of George Carlin!!!!!
Don't forget Gallagher! LOL
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Stormkitty
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 05:07 pm |
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I think you both worship in the church of George Carlin!!!!!
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Chris Abbott
Member
| Joined: | Sun Jun 3rd, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 40 |
| Status: |
Offline
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 04:52 pm |
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Here's a few more things to think about.
1) If Pro is good and Con is bad then what's the opposite of Progress?
2) If your wife leaves you for another woman do you hold the door for both of them?
3) Why do women have a "Pair" of panties but only 1 bra?
4) And is there really a such thing as a "Jumbo Shrimp"?
Thoughts like these kept me from making the Honor Roll!
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Slingblade
Member
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Posted: Fri Jun 22nd, 2007 04:25 pm |
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Well it’s Friday and I am sitting here at work pondering the little things in life. (Sue carol don’t tell) These are some of the things that make you go hummmmmmm:
- Which DID come first the chicken or the egg?
- What does Osama look like WITH OUT his beard?
- Why is ZZ Top’s Drummer’s last name Beard but he doesn’t have one?
- Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
- Why did Monica keep that dress in the closet?
Then I thought what we need to do for certain things in life…like world peace…
Let’s ALL get peace orders against each other….
That has got to be nobel prize winning!!!
Have a great and safe weekend!!!!!! Rock on Alex, Geddy, and Neil
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